Over the years I have kept a few journals. Sometimes I write out what is churning in my head. Other times I brainstorm possibilities for the future. I tried many different types of guided meditation while trying to conceive and sometimes made notes on these.
Today I was leafing through an old journal today looking for what my Australia work ideas were and came across some notes on a meditation I did when I was still reeling from losing Poppy a few days earlier.
*************The notes say
"I just did a meeting my spirit guide meditation on YouTube.
In the meditation I walked along a road, sealed, but with no cars. The tunnel was like a train tunnel and the gate was a metal one like outside houses in London. I wasn't aware of the surroundings.
I didn't *see* my guide but as I asked questions in my head, answers were given - like in a proper conversation. I need to keep my head clear of monkey chatter so I can pay attention to my guide.
- Her name is Alia like my friend.
- I need not to worry about having a child. She will come to me. I don't need to do anything different.
- My goal is to teach people - love and forgiveness. I can carry out my goal in any way I choose including working in personal change or IT.
- I need to go to Australia. I need the sea and she said that I know that.
- My guide will help me. "Of course Lisa, that is what I am here for". She will help with the physical tension and releasing energy blocks. I need to open my chakras and allow my intuition to develop."
I don't have a clear recollection of even doing this meditation. To be fair I was pretty upset at the time. It is interesting to me to see in retrospect that according to my subconscious, all those things I did to try to get pregnant were unnecessary. If only I listened to myself...
I am glad we are in Australia, I do need to be near the sea. I am thrilled Pickle came to us and wonder if I should be figuring out how to work towards my goal rather than how to return to work.